Tuesday, July 8, 2008

VP - It's the New Celebrity Drug of Choice

This post has been kicking around in my head for the last week. We, as political activists, have a vested curiosity and interest in the Vice-Presidential candidate selection process, but we're left completely in the dark about how the Party candidates (or campaigns) choose their running mates. Even the voting public, which disturbingly resembles several blocs of political consumers rather than actors or activists, has legitimate reason for disclosure into the decision process.

'Vetting' can unsettlingly bring forth images of smoke-filled rooms, people sitting in straight-back chairs with spotlights pointed at their faces, or even simply Masters of sublime evil sitting alone and cackling gleefully while stroking a white long-haired cat.

But as we've been told by LBJ, the job ain't worth more then a bucket of warm spit. Of course, Johnson never used the Vice-Presidency to any degree like Dick Cheney has. Unless you subscribe to the conspiracy that dares not speak its name. And then Johnson probably shot men in Reno (and everywhere else) just to watch them die.

Webb's withdrawal from the Veepstakes earlier this week has caused everyone who should know better to update their lists and freshly speculate. My favorite statistical sites - plug, plug - both had articles summarizing. And then Chris Cillizza popped his top 5 picks for both parties, causing the Votemaster to write a reaction.

The VP selection is total horserace crapola. Short of a highly placed insider jeaprodizing their job and probably all future employment as a partisan bureaucrat, the public and the media will remain in the dark about any VP deliberations the candidate has with his leadership team. The closest we'll come to it is the memoir or official history issued 2-4 years after the politician retires from government. Once the cat's dead and the secret headquarters has been destroyed.

But its addictive crapola. As crapola tends to be, otherwise we'd be ignorant of celebrity children, divorces, and infidelity. There may not be an actual evil genius involved, but narrative has never given much more than the smallest asscheek for veracity, especially when a good nickname gets coined.

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