Sunday, January 4, 2009

Guess What? God Causes Teenage Pregnancy!

Jesus causes teen pregnancy
This I know
Because Sarah and Bristol
Tell me so

Not in so many words, but that is what I got from their beautiful statement, that they had to release because the horrible awful press inquired and there was "erroneous" information flowing around.

Bill McAllister, the governor's office communications director, adds: "The governor's office previously declined to comment to honor the family's wishes that the event remain as private as possible. However, the high volume of press inquiries, along with some erroneous information that was published, prompted the governor to make a statement."

The great news is that Bristol and Levi, because they are so blessed with God's Will and are such hard workers, get to set aside any plans that they ever had for their futures, because God saw fit to bless them with a baby. It really has nothing to do with the fact that Bristol's mother is anti-birth control and anti-sex education. Because, if Bristol had been armed with proper information about her body and had the opportunity to approach her mother and father with honest information about her sexuality, she still would not have been able to prevent an unwanted pregnancy. The baby was God's Will; it had nothing to do with lack of communication or shame inducing guilt trips in the Palin household.

"We are over the moon with the arrival of this healthy, beautiful baby," Governor Palin said. "The road ahead for this young couple will not be easy, but nothing worthwhile is ever easy. Bristol and Levi are committed to accomplish what millions of other young parents have accomplished, to provide a loving and secure environment for their child. They are both hard workers, they're very strong, and have faith they've made the right decision in setting aside their own interests to make this child their highest priority."

For that baby's sake, I am happy that they are both hard workers. Extremely pleased. I hope that they will teach their child the things that were denied them.

Regardless of my snark, at least Sarah Palin has made it clear that God turns "circumstances" (circumstances are unfortunately defined as "an unessential or secondary accompaniment of any fact or event; minor detail") into blessings. I have a really difficult time referring to a "baby" as a circumstance; but, hey, I am just not as close to God as the Palins.

Palin added, "When Bristol and Levi first told us the shocking news that she was pregnant, to be honest, we all at first looked at the situation with some fear and a bit of despair. Isn't it just like God to turn those circumstances into such an amazing, joyful blessing when you ask Him to help you through?"

God's Will - the greatest excuse for shitty parenting, evah!



Judith said...

So, Sarah's baby will grow up with it's Nephew. How nice. Something is strange in this family.

I guess there is nothing wrong with believing that any given situation can be turned around into a blessing. However, in this case, I am a little surprised that the Palin's would have seen this, from the beginning, as anything but a blessing based upon their belief system.

I feel sorry for the two kids, as I doubt there was any discussion on what they wanted. I wouldn't make any bets on the success of this marriage.

Seven of Six said...

Someone will be miserable in this whole episode... probably Bristol and Levi... I just hope it isn't the kid... he'll be raised a good little brainwashed American.

Anjha said...

It is really, really sad.

I had read (back when the whol 'pregnanacy scandal' errupted that Bristol and Sarah fought over the wedding already. Apparently Sarah wanted them married before the Convention - this was prior to even being named VP nominee. Bristol refused.

This is good that at least the kid has some semblance of control over her own life. Getting pregnant might have been a manifestation of her lack of control...that this was one thing that mom could not mold in her daughter; Bristol could get pregnant regardless of what mom's plans for her were.

Sick crap and some way dysfunctional dynamics in that family. I do believe that Sarah has some serious mental problems. My guess is Borderline Personality Disorder - this fits well with what I have seen. No real identity, she becomes whatever she needs to become wherever she is to get the most out of the situation. Major self-centeredness, clinical self-centeredness. The world of Sarah revolves around Sarah. My arm-chair diagnosis would be Borderline PD...but, I think that most people have something fucking wrong with them.